All in the Family

The 'nuclear' family was a pervasive element in American mass media and culture for decades. The first thing that comes to my mind is all the programs on television that were centered on the lives of these nuclear families. Dad would walk in the door arriving home from work around 5 or 6 PM, and Mom would have dinner waiting on the table. In the morning, Mom would feed her husband and her children breakfast before sending them off to work and school, respectively. For many years this has been the prevalent image in Americans' minds as to what the "perfect" American family should be like. The husband was always the breadwinner of the household, and the wife was the primary cooker, cleaner, and caretaker of the children and household. Portrayal of the nuclear family in television, movies, and print allowed for a form of oppression to fall upon women who desired to break this mold. Modern families do not conform to this rigid structure. Today we see families with women as the primary breadwinners and the men as the homemakers. We also see many more households with single parents both maintaining professional careers and caring for their children. Modern television shows tend to depict both the age-old stereotypes as well as the more current dynamics of working-class and middle-class individuals and families. Richard Butsch writes in his essay "Ralph, Fred, Archie, Homer, and the King of Queens" that "the few working-class men were portrayed as buffoons...dumb, immature, irresponsible, and lacking in common sense...[but] typically well intentioned, even lovable". These blue-collar men were the heads of their households and were "played against more sensible wives". We do not think of an irresponsible, lazy man as the powerful husband in the ideal nuclear family, but the nuclear family is in a way represented through the sensible wife who keeps the household together. In the article "Dad-Mom Role Reversals," we see how there are many people in society who still think along the lines of the nuclear family concept despite the poor state of our current economy. Men who lose their jobs and find themselves becoming the caretaker of the children--the "stay-at-home dad"--often have a difficult time coming to terms with their new role in the family. Psychologists tell us that the experience of being laid off is emotionally devastating in itself and therefore makes the transition even more troublesome for professional men. As more and more women are becoming the primary breadwinners for their families and advancing their professional careers, an increasing number of men are taking the role of the homemaker. Although women have yearned to get out of the kitchen for years, some wives are very critical of their husbands' work in the household and find themselves picking up their husbands' slack, so to speak. It is clear that both men and women are among those who have a rough time letting go of previous roles, which in this case are very distinct for both genders and have until recent years been dominant in American society. One of the most important benefits of this role reversal is that husbands and wives are learning what it's like to be in each other's shoes and are thus becoming more empathic towards each other.